Tuesday, April 16, 2019
Recreation and Sports Essay Example for Free
Recreation and Sports EssayWhile it whitethorn be true that the stonemason City administration ought to devote more(prenominal)(prenominal)(prenominal) property to riverbank unskilled facilities, this references cause does non make a telltale(a) case for change magnitude resources based on river intake. It is easy to understand why metropolis residents would want a peeler river, but this argument is rife with holes and laying claims, and thus, non strong full to lead to improverd patronage. Citing discerns of metropolis residents, the author reports city residents love of piddle sports. It is non puddle, however, the scope and validity of that pursue.For example, the wad could fuck off asked residents if they elect victimisation the river for piss sports or would like to see a hydroelectric dam built, which whitethorn ask swayed residents toward river sports. The sample may not watch been representative of city residents, asking and those re sidents who live upon the river. The survey may know been 10 pages long, with 2 questions dedicated to river sports. We just do not know. Unless the survey is fully representative, valid, and reliable, it can not be used to efficaciously back the authors argument.Additionally, the author implies that residents do not use the river for swimming, boating, and fishing, despite their professed interest, because the piddle is polluted and smelly. While a polluted, smelly river would likely cut down on river sports, a concrete connection between the residents lack of river use and the rivers current state is not effectively made.Though on that point have been repinets, we do not know if there have been numerous complaints from a wide range of people, or perhaps from one or two individuals who made numerous complaints. To modify his/her argument, the author would benefit from implementing a normed survey asking a wide range of residents why they do not currently use the river.Buildi ng upon the implication that residents do not use the river due to the bore of the rivers body of water and the smell, the author suggests that a river clean up will turn up in increased river economic consumption. If the rivers water step and smell result from problems which can be cleaned, this may be true. For example, if the decreased water quality and aroma is caused by pollution by factories along the river, this conceivably could be remedied. But if the quality and aroma results from the natural mineral deposits in the water or surrounding rock, this may not be true. in that respect are almost bodies of water which emit a strong smell of sulphur due to the geography of the area. This is not roughthing likely to be afffected by a clean-up. Consequently, a river clean up may have no impact upon river usage. Regardless of whether the rivers quality is able to be improved or not, the author does not effectively show a connection between water quality and river usage. A clean, beautiful, safe river oftentimes adds to a citys property values, leads to increased tourism and revenue from those who come to take advantage of the river, and a reveal overall quality of life for residents.For these reasons, city political relation may decide to invest in alter riverside recreational facilities. However, this authors argument is not likely significantly persuade the city goverment to allocate increased funding. Reader Commentary for Essay solvent clear 6 This insightful response identifies important assumptions and thoroughly examines their implications. The final cause to spend more on riverside recreational facilities rests on three questionable assumptions, videlicet THAT THE SURVEY PROVIDES A RELIABLE BASIS FOR BUDGET PLANNING THAT THE RIVERS POLLUTION AND ODOR are THE ONLY REASONS FOR ITS LIMITED unpaid USE.THAT EFFORTS TO CLEAN THE WATER AND REMOVE THE ODOR WILL BE prospering By showing that each assumption is highly suspect, this attemp t demonstrates the weakness of the entire argument. For example, dissever 2 points out that the survey might not have used a representative sample, might have offered moderate choices, and might have contained very few questions on water sports. Paragraph 3 examines the subtle connection between complaints and limited use of the river for recreation.Complaints about water quality and odor may be coming from only a few people and, even if such complaints are numerous, other solely different factors may be much more significant in reducing river usage. Finally, paragraph 4 explains that certain geologic features may prevent effective river clean-up. Details such as these provide obligate support. In addition, careful organization ensures that each new point builds upon the previous ones. For example, note the clear transitions at the getning of paragraphs 3 and 4, as well as the logical sequence of sentences within paragraphs (specifically paragraph 4). Although this audition does contain minor errors, it still conveys ideas fluently.Note the effective word choices (e. g. , rife with . . . assumptions and may have swayed residents). In addition, sentences are not merely alter they also display skillful embedding of subordinate elements. For example, note the continue parallelism in the prototypal sentence of the concluding paragraph. Since this response offers cogent examination of the argument and conveys sum skillfully, it earns a score of 6. Essay Response Score 5 The author of this proposal to increase the figure for mason City riverside recreational facilities offers aninteresting argument but to move forward on the proposal would definitely require more in leapation and thinking.While the correlations stated are logical and probable, there may be hidden factors that prevent the City from diverting resources to this project. For example, intend the survey rankings among Mason City residents. The thought is that such high regard for water sp orts will translate into usage. But, survey responses can hardly be used as indicators of actual behavior.Many surveys conducted after the winter holidays reveal people who list exemplar and weight loss as a top priority. Yet every profession does not tinge a new gym membership. Even the vocabulary of the survey results remain ambiguous and vague. While water sports may be among the residents party favorite activities, this allows for many other favorites. What remains unknown is the priorities of the general public. Do they favor these water sports above a softball field or soccer field? Are they voluntary to sacrifice the municipal golf course for better riverside facilities? Indeed the survey hardly provides enough information to discern future use of improved facilities.Closely linked to the surveys is the bold assumption that a cleaner river will result in increased usage. While it is not illogical to expect some increase, at what level will people begin to use the river? T he answer to this question requires a survey to find out the reasons our residents use or do not use the river. Is river water quality the elementary limiting factor to usage or the lack of docks and piers? Are people more interested in water sports than the recreational activities that they are already engaged in?These questions will help the city political science forecast how much river usage will increase and to assign a proportional increase to the figure. Likewise, the author is optimistic regarding the state promise to clean the river. We convey to hear the source of the voices and consider any posterior motives. Is this a campaign year and the plans a campaign promise from the state representative? What is the timeline for the clean-up effort? result the state fully fund this project? We can imagine the misuse of funds in renovating the riverside facilities only to watch the new grammatical constructions fall into dilapidation while the state drags the river clean-up.L ast, the author does not consider where these additional funds will be diverted from. The current budget situation must be assessed to determine if this increase can be afforded. In a sense, the City may not be willing to draw money away from other key projects from road improvements to schools and education. The author naively removes that the money can simply appear without forethought on where it will come from. Examining all the various angles and factors entangled with improving riverside recreational facilities, the argument does not justify increasing the budget.While the proposal does cozy up a possibility, more information is required to warrant any action. Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 5 Each paragraph in the body of this perceptive essay identifies and examines an unstated assumption that is crucial to the argument. The major assumptions discussed are THAT A SURVEY CAN ACCURATELY PREDICT BEHAVIOR THAT cleanup THE RIVER WILL, IN ITSELF, INCREASE RECREATIO NAL USAGE THAT STATE PLANS TO CLEAN THE RIVER WILL ACTUALLY BE cognize THAT MASON CITY CAN AFFORD TO SPEND MORE ON RIVERSIDE RECREATIONAL FACILITIES. stand-in within each paragraph is both thoughtful and thorough. For example, paragraph 2 points out vagueness in the wording of the survey Even if water sports rank among the favorite recreational activities of Mason City residents, other sports may still be much more popular. Thus, if the first assumption proves unwarranted, the argument to fund riverside facilities preferably than soccer fields or golf courses becomes much weaker. Paragraph 4 considers some(prenominal) reasons why river clean-up plans may not be successful (the plans may be nothing more than campaign promises or funding may not be adequate).Thus, the weakness of the third assumption undermines the argument that river recreation will increase and riverside improvements will be needed at all. Instead of dismissing each assumption in isolation, this response places them in a logical order and considers their connections. Note the appropriate transitions between and within paragraphs, clarifying the think among the assumptions (e. g. , Closely linked to the surveys or The answer to this question requires ). Along with strong development, this response also displays initiation with language.Minor errors in punctuation are present, but word choices are apt and sentences suitably varied in pattern and length. The response uses a number of rhetorical questions, but the implied answers are always clear enough to support the points existence made. Thus, the response satisfies all requirements for a score of 5, but its development is not thorough or compelling enough for a 6. Essay Response Score 4 The problem with the arguement is the assumption that if the Mason River were cleaned up, that people would use it for water sports and recreation.This is not necessarily true, as people may rank water sports among their favorite recreational activiti es, but that does not mean that those same people have the financial ability, time or equipment to pursue those interests. However, even if the writer of the arguement is correct in assuming that the Mason River will be used more by the citys residents, the arguement does not say why the recreational facilities need more money. If recreational facilities already exist along the Mason River, why should the city allot more money to fund them?If the recreational facilities already in existence will be used more in the coming days, indeed they will be making more money for themselves, eliminating the need for the city government to devote more money to them. According to the arguement, the reason people are not using the Mason River for water sports is because of the smell and the quality of water, not because the recreational facilities are unacceptable. If the city government alloted more money to the recreational facilities, then the budget is being cut from some other important ci ty project. Also, if the assumptions proved unwarranted, and more people did not use the river for recreation, then much money has been wasted, not only the money for the recreational facilities, but also the money that was used to clean up the river to attract more people in the first place.Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 4 This sufficient response identifies two unstated assumptions THAT CLEANING UP THE MASON RIVER WILL LEAD TO INCREASED RECREATIONAL USE THAT EXISTING FACILITIES ALONG THE RIVER NEED MORE FUNDING Paragraph 1 offers reasons why the first assumption is questionable (e. g. , residents may not have the necessary time or money for water sports). Similarly, paragraphs 2 and 3 explain that riverside recreational facilities may already be adequate and may, in fact, produce additional income if usage increases.Thus, the response is adequately developed and satisfactorily form to show how the argument depends on questionable assumptions. However, this essay doe s not rise to a score of 5 because it fails to consider several other unstated assumptions (e. g. , that the survey is reliable or that the efforts to clean the river will be successful). Furthermore, the final paragraph makes some extraneous, unsupported assertions of its own. Mason City may actually have a budget spare so that cuts to other projects will not be necessary, and cleaning the river may provide other authentic benefits even if it is not used more for water sports.This response is generally free of errors in grammar and usage and displays sufficient control of language to support a score of 4. Essay Response Score 3 Surveys are created to speak for the people however, surveys do not always speak for the whole community. A survey completed by Mason City residents concluded that the residents enjoy water sports as a form of recreation. If that is so evident, why has the river not been used? The blame can not be soley be situated on the city park department. The city p ark department can only do as much as they observe.The real issue is not the residents use of the river, but their desire for a more pleasant smell and a more pleasant sight. If the city government cleans the river, it might take years for the smell to go away. If the budget is changed to accomodate the clean up of the Mason River, other problems will arise. The residents will then begin to complain about other issues in their city that will be ignored because of the expectant emphasis being placed on Mason River. If more money is taken out of the budget to clean the river an assumption can be made. This assumption is that the budget for another part of cit maintenance or building will be tapped into to.In addition, to the budget being used to clean up Mason River, it will also be allocated in increasing riverside recreational facilites. The government is trying to lull its residents, and one can warrant that the role of the government is to please the people. There are many assum ptions being made however, the government can not make the assumption that people want the river to be cleaned so that they can use it for recreational water activities. The government has to realize the long term effects that their decisiveness will have on the monetary value of their budget.Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 3 Even though much of this essay is tangential, it offers some relevant examination of the arguments assumptions. The early sentences mention a questionable assumption (that the survey results are reliable) but do not explain how the survey might have been flawed. Then the response drifts to irrelevant matters a defense of the city park department, a prediction of budget problems and the problem of pleasing city residents. Some statements even make unwarranted assumptions that are not part of the original argument (e. g. ,The residents will then begin to complain about other issues and This assumption is that the budget for another part of city main tenance or building will be tapped into).Near the end, the response does correctly note that city government should not assume that residents want to use the river for recreation. Hence, the proposal to increase funding for riverside recreational facilities may not be justified. In summary, the language in this response is reasonably clear, but its examination of unstated assumptions remains limited and therefore earns a score of 3. Essay Response Score 2.This statement looks like logical, but there are some wrong sentences in it which is not logical. First, this statement mentions raking water sports as their favorite recreational activities at the first sentence. However, it seems to have a ralation between the first sentence and the setence which mentions that increase the quality of the rivers water and the rivers smell. This is a wrong cause and result to solve the problem. Second, as a reponse to the complaints from residents, the state plan to clean up the river. As a result , the state expects that water sports will increase.When you look at two sentences, the result is not appropriate for the cause. Third, the last statement is the conclusion. However, even though residents rank water sports, the city government might devote the budget to another issue. This statement is also a wrong cause and result. In summary, the statement is not logical because there are some errors in it. The supporting setences are not strong enough to support this issue. Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 2 Although this essay appears to be carefully organized, it does not follow the directions for the assigned task.In his/her vague references to causal fallacies, the writer attempts logical analysis but never refers to any unstated assumptions. Furthermore, several errors in grammar and sentence structure intervene with meaning (e. g. , This statement looks like logical, but there are some wrong sentences in it which is not logical). Because this response does not f ollow the directions for the assigned task and contains errors in sentence structure and logical development, it earns a score of 2. Essay Response Score 1 The statement assumes that everyone in Mason City enjoys some sort of recreational activity, which may not be necessarily true.The statement also assumes that if the state cleans up the river, the use of the river for water sports will definitely increase. Reader Commentary for Essay Response Score 1 The brevity of this two-sentence response makes it fundamentally deficient. Sentence 1 states an assumption that is actually not present in the argument, and sentence 2 correctly states an assumption but provides no discussion of its implications. Although the response may begin to address the assigned task, it offers no development. As such, it is clearly extremely brief providing little evidence of an organized response and should earn a score of 1.